Falling into Autumn. Finding self love and joy
How are you? Me, I'm just ok.
I am dealing with some personal difficulties that seems to have hit me all at once.
I have separated from my husband, I'm looking to change careers, while continuing to look for work, and I have moved. All of this within a space of three weeks. It's hard, and sometimes I get overwhelmed and start crying, but at the end of the day, I have to put on my big girl panties and try to make sense of the nonsense.
Living in France and getting to know a system I really don't understand has been trying, but with the help of friends, I am making my way through. I have no choice.
Some days, I just want to ball up and cry the day away, but I don't. I allow myself 20 minutes a day to feel the sadness, but no more, because honestly, I don't have the time!
I am trying to look for additional work, but I seem to come up empty handed so far. I am trying to make ever euro stretch, only buying food, and the occasional cigarettes and wine. I also haven't been sleeping well due to shoulder pain and my dog deciding her comfortable space is in the middle of the bed.
I am glad to have my little dog with me, she has saved me from loneliness and despair, as I have to take care of her. I know she takes care of me too, helping me heal my heart and smothering her in cuddles.
My heart is broken, but I'm not the only one who has suffered from this ailment, and that too shall pass. I am slowly starting to pick up the pieces and mend them back together. I get a lot of sleep, which has been interrupted by shoulder pain and heartache, and do what I have to do to get me to the next day.
I talk to my friends on the regular, and they are kind and patient with me, so thank the Gods for them.
Everyday, I make an effort to get dressed up and pretty for myself and my city, because you never know who I may meet or run into!
I am slowly starting to be happy again, I watch a lot of TV and stay in, (which makes me happy) I don't venture out too much unless it is for work or appointments. I am a homebody, taking care of Cashew and myself.
I am trying to quit smoking cigarettes, chewing gum instead, but it seems futile. Cigarette smoking is a disgusting habit, I KNOW, but I just can't help myself. Plus them fuckers are expensive! My mom says I can't eat cigarettes, but I do enjoy them.
I am cooking well for myself, eating as many tacos as my little heart desires! I made some butternut squash soup and plan on eating it all!
Fall weather is upon us and it's become crisp, cool and cloudy, the sun has been hiding, but I know it's there. My attitude is slowly changing, but who knows what kind of person these events will shape me into! Hopefully kinder and gentler and not bitter. I try to stay positive, but sadness has a way of creeping in. I'm ok! Just ok, but I will be better soon.
I am toying with the idea of changing careers, I want to be a real estate agent, helping expats buy property in my beautiful city. Wish me luck on that, I don't know what it entails but if I ask the right questions, I am sure I will get the right answers.
Send positive vibes my way, because I need them and know that I love you.
Bonjour et Bienvenue!
Thank you for stopping by for a spell!
I am a 40-something year old American woman. Born in Texas, raised in Las Vegas!
Frenchified for Life
is a fabulous little lifestyle blog about truly embracing French life!
My intent is to simply inspire you to create something unique and beautiful in your everyday life. The French have this wonderful and annoying habit of seeing the world through rose colored glasses, might as well learn something from them!
That said, I lift my glass to you!
By the way, I mention the name Cachou (or The Cash) a lot, I'm referring to her...